And the Oscar Goes to........

Okay, I admit it, I am that mom. The one who ferociously defends her cubs, protecting them from harm but not putting up with any of their destructive fits either.  Yesterday was one of those days.  James needed to get a blood test done before his neurologist would give him more medication to control his seizures.  Easy enough.  James is my brave one, always good during the draws.  Showing those in the waiting room how experts do it.  Well, apparently James didn't get the memo about how good he is at the draws and took forty-five minutes to get off the sidewalk and into the car, and then one hour once we got to the lab to do his draw.  He lay on the floor, shut down, hands over ears, the whole works.  Finally I got him into to the draw room with silly videos of our cats.  He sat and giggled and I thought it would be quick, but the phlebotomists were not ready.  Okay people, I got him in and in a good mood; you need to work on his time, not yours.  Anyway... He had conditions, like he ALWAYS does.  He would sit in the chair but they couldn't put anything in his body.  Couldn't keep that deal.  Okay, he would sit in the chair but no one was allowed to touch him.  Couldn't make that deal either, because one would have to hold his hand to keep the other lab lady safe in case he lost it and slugged her.  Somehow the pressure band was placed, hold your breath now, little pin ......SCREAM.......ch.  James was beside himself.  Only five more tubes and then we are done.  Wailing child continued..... (Child??? This kid wears a size 12 men's shoe which is one size larger than my husband who is 6 foot 1 inch.) .... needle was removed and bandage was placed.  Away we went.  Got to the elevator and had to turn around because the bandage was soaked red.  More screaming.....  As we left for the second or seventh time, my husband asked if they believed he would get an Oscar for his performance.   >>scene change<<
Fifteen years ago or so, I was sitting in the doctor's office with my beautiful, headstrong, determined four- almost five-year old.  She was fine and chatting with the doctor about this and that other princess or Harry Potter something or other.  She has always been verbally precocious.  (My mother-in-law and I both witnessed my gorgeous four month old imitate "I love you." Cross my heart it happened!)  Anyway... there we were at the doctor and the topic of vaccinations came up.  She needed a Hepatitis A shot before entering kindergarten.  All of a sudden, she turned and emphatically told me in no uncertain terms that she would not be getting a shot on that day or any days in the near or far away future.  Okay, here we go.  I was used to epic long negotiations that were the length of War and Peace, all 1225 pages of it. (I am paraphrasing this because it was so long ago.) "I will NOT get a shot." "You need the shot to keep your body healthy." "My body is healthy and I don't need any more help protecting my body." "This shot will help keep your body safe from Hepatitis A, which is a dangerous disease." "I WILL NOT GET A SHOT AND YOU CAN'T MAKE ME!!!!"  "Okay, your choice, but don't come crying to me if you happen to get Hepatitis A and your skin turns yellow."  "I DON'T WANT YELLOW SKIN!!!!!" She flung herself onto the chair and the Hepatitis A vaccine was done.  She may be a master but I am the Supreme Master of Childhood Negotiations Defusement.   I am that mom.  Hate me if you must, but neither of my kids have yellow skin or have overdosed on their medication because they were allowed to refuse lifesaving blood tests and vaccinations.

Teachable Moment and Riddle...

When is 3rd place bronze way more precious than 1st place gold?  When you work super hard for the bronze and you get the gold just for showing up.  Today was the karate tournament that James dreads every year.  He HATES them, and he tells me I am the worst mom on the planet for signing him up for it without asking him.  I just tell him it is part of karate and until he is an adult, he follows the karate schedule.
We got to the venue at 9:15 and it took 30 minutes to get him to go into the building. Three hours later, when he still hadn't done any karate, he shut down again and flopped on the pavement just outside the building again.  Shutting down is his fabulous behavior that is so endearing!!! It is like trying to move dead weight through quicksand.  Anyway, off to the riddle.
After about hour 4.5, James was finally called for flag sparring.  He likes the flag sparring because it is gentler and more fun for him.  As we watched him take his place, my husband and I mentioned to each other how gigantic he looked compared to the slew of 4-6 year olds who were going to flag spar. After a short period of time, James was called over to the judges and presented with a gold medal because there was no one else in his age group who was going to do flag sparring.  He was elated that he had gotten a gold medal basically for showing up and breathing. He was so happy that all of the waiting seemed worth it.  This to me was kind of like forgetting about the pain of childbirth the moment the doctor handed me the two most beautiful babies I had ever seen.
I know, RIDDLE...  bear with me, it has been a veeeeeery long day.  James went on to do his Bo routine with such precision.  This was at hour 5 or so and he was soooooo done.  He didn't forget any of the routine, treated the judges with the respect they deserve and off he went.  He got a bronze metal and was sad with a "poor showing".  I decided it would be great to use this as a teachable moment.  I sat with my sullen son and started spinning my best mom lesson.  "James, which metal did you work hard for?  Which one means more to you?"  He thought for a second and quietly answered, "the bronze one because I had to do a routine and the gold one I got because no one else my age showed up." Love teachable moments!!!!!!!!!!  >>click here for wonderful video of Bronze moment<<

Autism Awareness, FINALLY, but not exactly the way I anticipated.

It has been a difficult decision for our family to figure out if we should talk to James about Autism. We have never hid it from him, it is after all, one of the defining factors that makes him who he is.  In the past, we have talked about it as a different way of interacting with and experiencing the world. He never really has seemed that interested in owning this part of his life.  I figured he would talk to us about it when he is ready.  He is finally able to list the 3 main components that are underlying in the diagnosis.  Today, not unlike every other day, James was complaining about practicing his guitar.  He feels that if he plays through the song once, he is done.  I have a different idea on practice techniques. Anyway, he shutdown and got really upset when we tried to negotiate him back into the chair with the guitar and pic.  He yelled and I stood my ground.  Eventually, he got through the practice.  All of a sudden, he apologized and looked at me and stated, "I guess this is because of my Autism.  It is a different way interacting with my environment." (It actually is because he hates to practice and he was being pre-teen difficult!!) James has never chosen to own his different ability. He has always gotten upset with us when we talk about it.  I guess, Autism now has something to offer him.  He is now aware like we are everyday of our lives.

                                                       >>click here for Autism pamphlet<<

Just Hanging With a Few Great Friends!!!!

James doesn't really like to read.  He prefers to have the action happen on a screen.  Today, I caught him with his favorite friend, Rodger, and a good book, (he is expected to read 30 minutes everyday after school).  It is a Minecraft book but he was reading and enjoying it!!! He even went over his 30 minutes by about 20 minutes but we just didn't have the heart to pull him away from this fun!! 

Problem Solved James Style!!!

James has been under the weather for the past few weeks.  Last week he looked soulfully at me and moaned, "I want a one way ticket to Heaven because I can't handle this cold and allergies at the same time."  I talked him down from his desire to leave this world because of a cold with the simple fact that Minecraft doesn't exist in Heaven.  He decided it would be okay to stay here as we gave him more decongestant that may or may not be helping him.
He finally got diagnosed with something that we could fix, an ear infection!  Anyway, James's school allows for independent study as another part of the school is home schooling.  I set him up for independent home study for Wednesday, Thursday and Friday.  James got to sleep in and I planned for breaks and getting the work his teachers sent us to do.  The system worked really well.  James got enough sleep and got to work at a pace that worked with his sick body.
One day we were working on history, Ancient Greece.  One of the vocabulary words that stuck in his head was Funerary Vase. This was an urn type vase that the Ancient Greek folks believed would allow the dearly departed inhabitant to enjoy their favorite activity after death.  James looked at me and beamed!! "Mom, I can do Minecraft in Heaven!  It is my favorite thing and the Funerary vase helps people enjoy their favorite things after they die." Okay, got it but little man may be missing an important point, I don't think there is electricity in Heaven for his computer or extra batteries for his tablet.
James is feeling much better and he will be returning to school on Monday for 4 days and then will be on vacation.  He asked for us to take this video last night to prove he is feeling better.... Enjoy!!

Wasn't Expecting this Reaction!

Okay, need a little back story... James "accidentally" punched the metal pole on the tether ball equipment yesterday at school.  There was much dismay about his bruised little finger, slightly swollen hand and the pain.  I happened to have a sling from a few years ago and he grinned as I suited him up.  Luckily the injury happened to his right hand and he is a lefty.  James loves to be at home and get to do James stuff.
My husband was staying home today to transport me to a clinic about 30 minutes away from home because I am not currently able to drive.  James woke up in the morning with the burning question, "what do I do about school today?" Well, after a very short discussion it was decided that an x-ray might be in order so he was given the go ahead to stay home but he would need to accompany his parents on their day.  He agreed believing he was getting a pretty good deal.
X-ray, my Dr. appointment, 2 1/2 hours at the wheelchair lift repair shop we finally returned home.  The whole trip out took about 7 hours.  I was able to check on his x-ray through his doctor's email and it came back normal.  He was happy it wasn't broken.  I told him this meant that he could go back to school tomorrow.  Without hesitation, from the back seat of the van, came a loud cheer!  Guess we know what to do the next time James decides to punch the tether ball pole with his his fist and wants a day off!

Lost in Translation

Sometimes the things our kids say can be hard to figure out.  There are things from my kids' early years that I continue to miss. My daughter was verbally precocious.  At 18 months old one of her favorite things to say was, "gogo baball." Now for those of us who knew her well we knew that she wanted to watch, for the 100th time, the live action Cinderella with Whitney Houston. Well, James is a different kid.  He was a late talker (he had speech at 12 months but lost all of it at about 14 months). We learned very quickly how to translate his communicative attempts.  Fast forward many years to today.
James often calls me from school for this or that ailment.  He has hurt toes, headaches, earaches, an allergy nose, just about anything he can invent to get out of (most likely) math class.  Today he had a headache, his ear hurt and his nose had allergies.  I told him I wasn't able to get him, told him to go back to class, made a late afternoon doctor appointment and called my husband to have him leave work early so he could drive us to the appointment. James's math teacher meanwhile emailed me stating that James left his class early because his hair was causing his head to hurt.
My husband and I met James off the bus and he looked remarkably happy for a kid with so many health woes.  He came bouncing to the car and was surprised to find that we were heading to the doctor's office.  He then indicated that the curls were too long and poking into his ears causing ear and head pain. So I cancelled the doctor appointment and told James that Dad had to come home early from work because we thought there was something medically wrong.  Anyway, the best cure for all that ailed him today was...

an EPIC HAIRCUT!!! no curls, sigh